Good Question

It's been a while (don't remember when) since I created the F/M Spanking  group on Fetlife and I really don't pay too much atention to the posts there. Many of the posts are just someone saying something like "Any Female Spankers in Cleveland?" or similar. Well I don't know about female spankers in Cleveland but there sure are a hell of a lot of spankos in Cleveland but that discussion is for another day.

In any event there was a good question posted there yesterday by a woman who spanks her husband and has been doing so for about 13 years. In another post she suggests that he had, and I quote: "...when the hubby approached me and asked me for a disciplinary lifestyle where I handed out the discipline and he received it! He got a lot more than he bargained for...".

Well, sounds likek a lucky fellow, perhaps a reader here.

Here's her question:
Perhaps this has been discussed earlier, I haven’t really read all the posts in the group but I will ask anyway in case it hasn’t.



Being very vanilla when I started this with the hubby, I was always amazed at how he would stay down for the entire spanking. I mean, he is bigger and stronger than I am, and since it is totally consensual, he could get up and walk away at any time…yet he never has. Oh, he begs me to stop, and says he can’t take any more, but I reassure him he can and to take a deep breath and suck it up till it’s over. The first few lickings I gave him I felt bad, almost guilty for hurting him like that…but we became closer than ever after we started this, and I know now that he can take a whole lot.


Are the rest of you guys like that? Is this a “macho” thing or a mind set into total submission to the punishment… a tangible way to atone for a mistake you may have made? Or could it be a masochistic thing? I understand the sexual side of it, but yet at least in our case spankings do get results, in the way of better behavior. I have cured many ills with a wooden paddle or cane over the years.


Anyway…. just curious, thought I’d get your take on it here in the forum – not too many ladies to confide in who live this kind of life.


Hisboss


I don't often respond to posts on the group but this one I did and here's an echo of my response. I think it may fit for many of us.

For me it’s incredibly difficult to stay in place, and there have been times when I have not managed to stay in place. Usually, it’s when I have no idea how much of a spanking is still to come.


Odd as it may be, it may earn me another dozen with a really wicked paddle, cane or even just extra hard full swings with the hairbrush or bath brush. However, when I know what’s left it’s almost easier to take the pain. But actually when that happens I’m more conscious of what’s happening and not getting lost in the spanking.


I want to cry from one of her spankings, but I never have yet. I can’t imagine anything I want more, I want to be a blubbering ball of putty being comforted in her aftercare, but it just hasn’t happened.


Could it be a big boys don’t cry machismo thing? I don’t know but whatever it is I want that wall to fall someday and the sooner the better. .


It may very well take an incredible amount of scolding or even encouragement combined with an incredibly long painful spanking perhaps even multiple spankings to get the wall to fall. I really don’t know, I just want the wall to fall and I think whatever it is, once the wall falls from that point on it will be much easier for her to get me to that place again.

The History of My Implements

Thinking back to a half dozen years ago when the whole spanking interest began to occupy my mind there were a series of purchases that started the entire craze on what was to become nothing less than an implement obsession.

Naturally, the first adult spanking I ever gave was with the oldest and most time-honored implement known to mankind... my hand. The subject of my efforts was a newly acquired girlfriend at the time who shared my interest in exploring "Screw the Roses, Bring Me the Thorns" from cover to cover. (We had several very interesting weekends together before we went our separate ways, it’s an interesting book.)

It really didn't go that well in retrospect, the subject of my effort was startled at the intensity and I too at that first endeavor. After only five hard smacks I decided that the hand was a damn poor spanking implement since it probably hurt much worse than her bottom did. Well, we were having none of it and promptly went for a drive to the local Wally-World to find a suitable replacement implement for my throbbing hand.

We walked to the checkout aisle with what might have appeared to be something of an odd purchase. We had a ping-pong paddle (only one), a hairbrush and a bath brush. That was my first "maybe someone knows" moment as the check out girl's eyes lit up and in fact she had a very peculiar grin during the entire transaction.

So we'll call the ping pong paddle the first specific spanking related purchase as we immediately upon use determined the hairbrush and bath brush were perhaps better suited for their original purpose. That particular determination remains in my brain to this day and matters little to my fine lady who happily uses both with fervor. Over the subsequent years I’ve learned that my hand is very capable of hundred of effective smacks, like with most spanking implements it’s how they are used that makes the big difference.

The ping pong paddle actually seems to offer more scare than actual pain. In weaker moments I've considered using a jigsaw to lessen it's business end down to the size of a hairbrush in an effort to make it more effective but then thankfully I've never actually tried since common sense prevails and I wonder why the hell would I ever want to do that. These days I happen to be very aware of just "who" effective implements will be used on.

The odd thing seems to be that with a few exceptions, the ‘oh shit’ implements usually seem to be the ones that were most recently purchased no matter it be strap, paddle or cane and the ones that have found their way to the bottom of the ‘toy drawer’ lose their intimidation factor.

That particular realization came to mind not that long ago when my fine lady reached deep and brought out what has become a seldom used old leather paddle with holes that I had forgotten about.


The funny thing now is, that particular item is back on the 'oh shit' list and I don’t actually remember it having ever been there before.

Apparently leather softens with use and age, but it’s effectiveness does quite the opposite. Then again, it could just be that my fine lady has learned to use just about any implement effectively...

Oh shit.

 

 

Been a While

It's been a while since I've done any bloging. Actually, there just hasn't been that much unique to blog about. There have a couple of spankings and in fact one of them may very well have been the longest and most intense spanking that I've ever received.

More about that in a minute.

I haven't talked about it here on this blog before, but we both have to deal with a considerable amount of stress just like many couples have to deal with these days. I see the same thing in many others spanking blogers that there are probably many couples just like us out there who are in similar circumstances. Often the stress is related to procreation.

No, it's not that I find procreation and it's accompanying required activity of vaginal penetration to be sometimes stressful. Well, then again perhaps it can be sometimes stressful considering some of the strange contortions that are considered to be "positions".

But actually, it's those other annoying aspects of vaginal penetration that can cause so much stress. More specifically, the tangible result of the vaginal penetration that I participated in a couple of decades ago, AKA: Children.

Sometimes it just seems that there isn’t a day or even a partial day that can go by without some sort of post vaginal penetration related issue and often the issue is related to someone's car.

One’s car might be broken, another’s car is sitting without gas and no money to buy gas to get to work. Another may have a perfectly functional car and no driver’s license because someone forgot to pay a ticket. Funny how those local magistrates just have no sense of humor when someone forgets to pay a ticket.

Then again the most frequent stress generator these days is nothing more than money or more precisely, the lack of money. We have been plagued by a lack of employment. Just like those local magistrates it appears that utilities and landlord appear to also lack generous senses of humor.

Back to spanking.

Considering the above narrative, it’s not hard to imagine that many of our spanking sessions have been related to stress relief. Although I love the sensations that I experience after a stress relief spanking, that doesn’t mean I enjoy the actual spanking itself, not when I’m on the receiving end at least.

Several weeks ago I knew a spanking was coming my way, it was obvious, there are signals and signs.

When my fine lady is contemplating spanking my poor ass there are little signals that start to come my way. You know, those little signals… like when she’s walking past me and takes the opportunity to make a quick slap on my still Levis protected bottom. Those quick little love-taps become more frequent and then ultimately sometime when we happen to have privacy and I hear her in the bedroom rummaging around in the implement drawer I usually begin to get a particularly strong inkling that I just might be getting a spanking in the not too distant future.

Then again probably the most clear sign that a spanking is coming my way is when she walks into whatever room I’m in and motions with her finger and says something like… “Come here NOW!”.

However the most telling sign that I'm going to be getting a spanking is when she's looking straight into my eyes and says something like "drop 'em". Of course at that moment there's no doubt left and all the wonder is gone... I'm going to be spanked.

So, there I was with my fine lady on the edge of the bed pointing to the direction in which she wanted me positioned, all the while with a raging hard on that would have embarrassed any of those famous marble statues that pass for fine art.

Now you would think that there would be damn few things that come as easily and naturally as placing a rock hard ding-ding between the thighs of my fine lady, but doing so while climbing over her lap always seems to be one of those things that create considerable discomfort long before a hand is raised and violently lowered.

The beginning of a spanking is often almost relaxing for me. Well, relaxing might not be right word but if you’ve been there and most readers likely have, you know what I mean. You may have been anticipating the spanking for hours, or days or even weeks and now that it's going to happen... all of the spanking related erotic thoughts are now going to be fulfilled.

Of course there are split seconds where you wish you spent a little more time positioning your ding-ding and there is also the realization that “oh yeah, I forgot that spankings hurt” but then again there is that little lie that you tell yourself and almost believe “this won’t be that bad”. Well, it’s that last one that really got the best of me this time.

She gave me a warm up with her hand. Warm ups are always too short and these days not as enjoyable as they used to be because by the time she finishes I’m going to be pretty red and already sore, once again convinced that I really don’t like spankings.

Almost all of my spankings have been somewhat predictable in the sense that it’s going to be just so long, and just so painful, but this was somehow different.

My fine lady was doing her typical fine job of adding sting and raw sore to my bottom and I expected by the rotation of implements that there was probably going to be maybe no more than another five of ten more minutes of continued spanking in my future, as you might expect by this point I was wrong.

Suddenly I was ordered up off of her lap, I was actually a bit disappointed since although my bottom was already hot and sore it was certain that it wasn’t going to be one of those spankings that I would still feel tomorrow and certainly not the second day. Somewhat disapointed that after all the build-up in my mind it was over too soon. Funny how we spankos are that way, many of us hate the spanking but love being able to feel it two or more days later. The reality however was that she actually was determined that would not be an issue.

Now from past experience at this point in a spanking I might normally expect being ordered over some pillows for a set with the cane or strap and then we would progress to the wonderful aftercare, that was not to be.

My fine lady got up off of the edge of the bed and then sat at the head of the bed and directed me back in place over her lap. Another aspect of this point in a spanking is that my little fellow has usually lost interest and relaxed himself away for more enjoyable future moments, but this was different.

In the past when she has taken this particular position it’s been for that all too rare erotic spanking, Mr. Happy began to anticipate this hopeful finale and was again standing at full attention. The erotic spanking was not to be, she simply had too much still to do and decided that for my complete discomfort she needed a more comfortable position so she could spank much longer and of course much harder.

Often while being spanked I really don’t have too much of a clue as to what I’m being spanked with unless she has decided to tell me. Usually all I know is that something is either not tollerable or it’s barely tollerable since it’s how she uses it that matters the most. The order of the implements doesn’t really matter but it’s always sure thing that she’ll manage to choose and use the ones that tend to get the most intense reaction from me and this occasion was no different in that respect. I know she had the Jokari, the wicked oak hairbrush paddle, the bath brush, the lexan with holes, the rubber paddle and that awful acrylic paddle from Cane-iac and she was using each and every one of them with a ferocity that I had never experienced before.

With my face buried in the pillow I was doing my best to tolerate what was playing out upon my ass, but it wasn’t working. Every time she changed implements she rubbed in a comforting fashion that told me the spanking was finally over, but it was not.

I’m usually not very vocal while being spanked but she managed to get more noise out of me than she has ever gotten before. The spanking just wasn’t ending and where usually I would anticipate another 15 or 20 smacks and a break, well she wasn’t taking breaks. I began to realize that if she didn’t finally make me cry, the day will come when she does… and that thought alone made me realize just how much I’m in love with this woman.

I didn’t cry although I was closer than I’ve ever been before, I was trembling and almost hyperventilating, it was a tremendous experience and I thanked her and wanted her.

Thank you God for this wonderful woman.