Motivation

Well there hasn’t been much spanking at all around the “Her Paddle Household” for quite some time now and I think My Fine Lady is getting the idea that she just might intend to change that. I did help that along.

For quite some time now we’ve both have been under an incredible amount of stress. Not uncommon these days for most couples, ours is centered around our financial dilemma. I’ve been unemployed for far too long and we fight a constant battle with the stack of un-payable bills. At least we haven’t been fighting.

Last night I was rubbing her back and I mumbled in her ear that I needed a good spanking. She asked why… I thought for a second and answered: For all the usual reasons…” She said nothing.

Basically, spanking hasn’t been part of our life for a while now. The biggest problems mentioned above have resulted in a few different conditions that I blame myself for, which naturally build upon themselves. For one, I’ve been lethargic. Additionally, in spite of my having something of a dominant strong personality (except while over her lovely lap) I’ve probably been as close to what I can possibly be on the verge of clinical depression. So in any event my whisper to her may have set things into motion.

When she finally decides that I’m going to get a spanking, she chooses the time for the actual event carefully. It would be unusual for it to happen when I’m expecting it, so it could be days away and I imagine I’m going to be on edge for at least a few days but I’ll be getting more and more hints the closer it gets. Usually there will be a day or three of random slaps to my ass when

I least expect them. Also there will

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Well I didn’t have to wait very long, no she didn’t interrupt my typing. I took a break and was out on the porch having a smoke when she opened the door and I saw the ominous curling finger. I walked in and saw she was holding the sawed off bathbrush and the hated oak hairbrush paddle as I followed her to the bedroom.

We’ve all seen those pictures of those women who lead the way up a staircase or down a hall carrying implements. Right about at this point is when my pride and joy would usually be standing at full attention making it difficult to drop my pants, but not this time… he was hiding. I guess he suspected like I did that this could be bad.

She sat on the edge of the bed and pointed my over her knee. I tried to get as comfortable as possible since I knew I would likely be there for quite some time.

Right from the start she scolded or actually kept asking me questions about why I was getting spanked. She rubbed from the get go for quite a while and the questions weren’t easy… They dug deep and she began to spank with her bare hand. She spanked every square inch of my up-turned ass from the tops of my thighs to above my crack. I couldn’t believe how long her hand spanking lasted and the scolding questions were getting to me.

Apparently she’s been getting very pissed about my basking in self-pity. My self-pity has been centered around my inability to provide for her in a fashion that she deserves. The basic fact is, I’ve been getting pissed about it too. I have very little sympathy for people who bask in self-pity and it actually sickens me to realize it in myself.

My Fine Lady has had a difficult life. From her youth to adulthood she has repetitively been forced to endure some very nasty hardships and subsequently make some very difficult decisions. One decision that was very easy for her was that I was long overdue for a spanking, she rectified that issue.

The hand spanking lasted for at least ten minutes. I’ve never been spanked by bare hand OTK for that long before and I began to zone out from the probing questions, comments and rhythmic spanking.

When she stopped she rubbed for a long time as she continued about all of the things that have been bothering her.

I’m pretty sure it was the sawed off bathbrush that was next used on my ass. She wasn’t spanking very hard with it, but it was enough that my hips were dancing on her knee and she finally had enough of it. “It’s been a long time since you’ve been spanked so I’m being very easy on you. But if you don’t stop bouncing around I’m going to start spanking hard.”

Don’t you hate that? When you have to try and ignore the wicked sting and just lay there?

It was difficult, but I was finally just laying there, again as she continued to scold. Which diverted my brain from the unending sting. She finished up with the wicked oak hairbrush paddle. That little bastard stings like hell. It doesn’t have the thud of the bathbrush but the sting is more intense and concentrated.

All things considered it was probably one of the lightest spankings that I’v ever had but the consistent rhythym and the length of spanking probably had me closer to breaking down and letting tears flow than I think I’ve been in I don’t know how long.

After, she asked how my spanking was. I had no choice, I had to tell her that she’ll have to do it again.

Always New Techniques and Implements

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Pain Isn't Always From The Paddle

Tina at Die starke Frau mentioned in a recent post that from her perspective, she didn't care for the concept of cuckolding. Well to each their own and I posted a comment how I didn't see it as really useful from a DD perspective. Basically, I believe once the spanking is over, the humiliation should be over and that may be mutually exclusive when there is a cuckold husband. She made a comment that she may blog about humiliation and I look forward to reading her perspctive on it.

Here's mine, it starts with the text I left on her blog.

The unique form of DD that we practice (Mutual DD) like all forms of DD, does have an element of humiliation. For example, the whole concept of willingly submitting to a spanking is a humbling act, ergo humiliation.


However, for me the most important part of DD is the aftercare. Where the spanking and any and all of the other things that may have been used that add humiliation, break down walls and barriers and offer the spanker the opportunity to bring things to the surface that must be dealt with. Or, even when the spanking just lets things be talked about, all accomplished not just with the aid of the painful spanking, but also with humiliation.

Once the spanking is over one of the most important jobs of the spanker from my perspective is to rebuild the spankee’s ego, their cared-for position in the relationship and also rejuvenate their persona that the rest of the world sees. The tenderness of aftercare, the forgiveness, the cleaning of the slate so to speak are all items that bring back and reconstruct the spankee.

Without a doubt, the most intense pain that can be administered isn’t from the paddle, nor the strap or the cane. The most intense pain that can be administered to the submissive husband in a DD relationship is certainly humiliation.

Actually, humiliation is possibly the most frequently used tool while a true punishment is administered.

The mere suggestion that he has been something less than the man that he could and should be, can be extremely powerful.

What are some other humiliations? Well, the implement and the position are the most obvious possibilities. However, each disciplinarian learns not just what provides sting to the buttocks but also those things that can sting the brain. After all, it's actually the brain that is spanked, the butt is merely a very effective conduit to the brain.

Some aspects of a spanking are more humiliating than others. Being put in the diaper position or even like I recently posted... being given an enema are just a few of the most obvious aspects of humiliation that can be incorporated in typical DD punishment activities.

Being ordered into the corner can make the tallest man feel small.

Ordered to wear humiliating clothing, which can vary of course from couple to couple. Perhaps for one couple it may be panties on the man. For others, it may be a complete outfit or even just diapers.

Actually, simply being ordered to “Drop ‘em” at her command and the accompanying embarrassment of her seeing Mr. Happy at full staff when he won’t be used for his joyous intended purpose.

Complying with her order and laying across her lap with one’s ass presented for her use can be very humbling at the very least, and for some be the height of humiliation.

Various positions that offer nothing in protection and everything in vulnerability for her use, all of these things help her break down the walls that men typically build to protect their weaker sides from being viewed by the rest of the world.

I’m of the opinion that the most effective female disciplinarians use these and other techniques to knock a man down a notch and perhaps put him in his place. Now the more femdom-ish ladies may use these or other techniques of humiliations to keep her man in a lower and completely dominated place.

However in many households once a man is reduced with these techniques, the woman instead of destroying his foundation actually just knocks down the crooked walls that stood contrary to her needs. The ones that did not suit her desires in her man. Then, with aftercare she sets new lines and then rebuilds him back the man she wants and knows he can be. Giving him forgiveness and setting him and the relationship back to base course.

Basically, as I see it, humiliation stops when the spanking stops. If it doesn't, perhaps the spanking shouldn't have ended so soon.

The History of My Implements

Thinking back to a half dozen years ago when the whole spanking interest began to occupy my mind there were a series of purchases that started the entire craze on what was to become nothing less than an implement obsession.

Naturally, the first adult spanking I ever gave was with the oldest and most time-honored implement known to mankind... my hand. The subject of my efforts was a newly acquired girlfriend at the time who shared my interest in exploring "Screw the Roses, Bring Me the Thorns" from cover to cover. (We had several very interesting weekends together before we went our separate ways, it’s an interesting book.)

It really didn't go that well in retrospect, the subject of my effort was startled at the intensity and I too at that first endeavor. After only five hard smacks I decided that the hand was a damn poor spanking implement since it probably hurt much worse than her bottom did. Well, we were having none of it and promptly went for a drive to the local Wally-World to find a suitable replacement implement for my throbbing hand.

We walked to the checkout aisle with what might have appeared to be something of an odd purchase. We had a ping-pong paddle (only one), a hairbrush and a bath brush. That was my first "maybe someone knows" moment as the check out girl's eyes lit up and in fact she had a very peculiar grin during the entire transaction.

So we'll call the ping pong paddle the first specific spanking related purchase as we immediately upon use determined the hairbrush and bath brush were perhaps better suited for their original purpose. That particular determination remains in my brain to this day and matters little to my fine lady who happily uses both with fervor. Over the subsequent years I’ve learned that my hand is very capable of hundred of effective smacks, like with most spanking implements it’s how they are used that makes the big difference.

The ping pong paddle actually seems to offer more scare than actual pain. In weaker moments I've considered using a jigsaw to lessen it's business end down to the size of a hairbrush in an effort to make it more effective but then thankfully I've never actually tried since common sense prevails and I wonder why the hell would I ever want to do that. These days I happen to be very aware of just "who" effective implements will be used on.

The odd thing seems to be that with a few exceptions, the ‘oh shit’ implements usually seem to be the ones that were most recently purchased no matter it be strap, paddle or cane and the ones that have found their way to the bottom of the ‘toy drawer’ lose their intimidation factor.

That particular realization came to mind not that long ago when my fine lady reached deep and brought out what has become a seldom used old leather paddle with holes that I had forgotten about.


The funny thing now is, that particular item is back on the 'oh shit' list and I don’t actually remember it having ever been there before.

Apparently leather softens with use and age, but it’s effectiveness does quite the opposite. Then again, it could just be that my fine lady has learned to use just about any implement effectively...

Oh shit.

 

 

No One Likes a Busybody

Whereas no one likes a busybody, at this particular moment I just couldn’t help myself as I peered curiously at what my fine lady was doing. Granted, there were probably other things available to occupy my mind.

Actually now that I reflect upon it, there were numerous things to keep my mind busy at that little twinkling of time.

One thing I could have concentrated on was the fact that I was naked from the waist down, and that certainly is something that offers plenty of things to think about.

Another was that fact that I was laying face down on the bed, that too offers much for the mind to mull over.

Additionally, there was a very tall stack of pillows in the center of the bed, again something to ponder.

The fact that the aforementioned tall stack of pillows were placed in such a manner as to raise my bare ass into the prevailing breeze all by itself could have kept my mind busy for quite some time.

In spite of all of these things to keep my noggin occupied… perchance fascinated isn’t the right word. None the less, she had my undivided attention and if not fascinated I was certainly concentrating intently on all of her actions.

On one hand, I didn’t want to interrupt her for some possibly obvious reasons. However there was something that was just a bit disturbing about the way she was gleefully handling our new additions to the pain drawer.

You may realize that I managed to identify this as a stressful situation. In spite of this obviously stressful situation, somehow she managed to keep her composure and always unique sense of humor.

She was just smiling a little too much for my comfort while taking practice swings in the air (the air did absolutely nothing wrong by the way).

Not that my comfort had any place in either her thoughts or plans and as can be imagined, frankly quite the opposite.

Then there was some sort of comment that came my way about there was nothing at all to worry about, if one item didn’t turn my butt a deep dark shade of purple, there were plenty of other items to choose from.

No wonder I'm in love, that's the great thing about her, she's always thinking of how things turn out for me.

.

The Endless Question (part 1)

Today I decided to write about that one question that if not endless, is certainly repetitive. The question might be framed several different ways but the subject is always the same, implements. Constantly popping up on spanking forums be it ones like Spanking Classics or the dozens of spanking related forums on FetLife. It might appear as "What is your favorite implement?" or perhaps "What implement do you fear the most?".

Favorite? Well that's a bit contradictory isn't it, what they meant is what one makes you gasp when you see it out of the hiding place.

In any event there are always some front runners that will be brought up in these discussions. Spanked Hubby on his old blog would often discuss various forms of the bathbrush as I recall. There are endless varieties of the bathbrush, at one time perhaps the favorite of the spanking community was sold online by the Vermont Country Store, another top contender was from The Body Shop.

Never to be forgotten is the Jokari. Getting harder to find, it once was included in a popular yard game. They can still be found on eBay from time to time, but there are certainly many similar sized and weighted replicas available from the reputable paddle makers.

Most bathbrushes and Jokari paddles are probably right on the edge of being useable for OTK, so naturally if that's usually how your most memorable spankings occur then you'll certainly be familiar with them. The smaller versions which fall into the hairbrush category and are probably without a doubt the most frequently used since they are much lighter and allow the spanker more flexibility in placing the smacks where they'll be most effective. This will allow the spanking to persist for a longer and much more painful event without wearing out the spanker. Of course the spankee getting worn out is not a factor here.

It's gotten really hard to find good quality, inexpensive heavy wooden hairbrushes these days. Most of the inexpensive ones these days are made of plastic and just don't have the oomph preferred by discriminating spankers. The spankee's preferences here once again are not a factor.

Wally World actually has been carrying a rather small wooden hairbrush; of course I bought a couple as they were less than $4.00 US. Foolish me thought "how much could they hurt?", well they can actually hurt and quite a lot.

The small surface seems to be very concentrated and rather painful and just too damn easy for the spanker to effectively use. There has to be a balance here, why should it be too easy for the spanker?



(to be continued with canes and strops and all, oh my)

Never Quick and Simple

I suppose that for those of us who experience punishment spankings or at least crave them we realize that if the pants come down it's not going to be quick and simple.

This is another few photos found at F/M Spanking World of Lina's House of Discipline. You can imagine your own script but here we see a simple warm-up with her hand. That part never seems to last long enough does it?

Before long, the warm-up turns into burn-up as the effectiveness of a well used strap becomes obvious.

This implement would appear to a particularily nasty little slapper although it probably is a relief after that strap.

Naturally, what punishment wouldn't be complete without a bit of cane pain.

At the completion of the task the lovely lady is justifiably proud of her accomplishment. However as I look at this I realize that my lady would never let me get away like this without crimsome upper thighs and a well tendered crease spot.

Guess I'm the lucky one!

The Loveable Cane

About a year and a half ago my lovely lady decided to order a few items from Cane-iac.

She didn’t order the full length ones, I think ours are about 24” or so, one thin with very wicked sting and one thicker with very wicked sting and a little thud. She also bought an OTK-ish five strand rattan thing that hasn’t been used much at all, and now that it has been used I wish she never bought the damn thing.

The first canes I ever experienced I bought from an online vendor of instruments of pain. They were available in different thicknesses so I bought a couple, they were cheap enough and were simply raw rattan. Wanting them to be properly conditioned I soaked them with linseed oil in hopes of making them last longer. Well that was pretty much a complete waste of time, they broke on first use.

Without a doubt the Cane-iac canes have been a very good purchase, hence the title The Loveable Cane, I do like it when we get our moneys worth. It does seem to be obvious that canes do break yet ours have lasted for well over a year and a half. Granted they aren’t used daily and only come out for serious punishments (are there any other kind?). Actually the thin one broke inside the handle and I’ve considered glueing it back on and just haven’t gotten around to it. Why should I make it easier to use?

Of course I’ve thought of ordering their 32” cane and probably will one of these days but cash is tight right now. Of course every time I go to the Cane-iac site they have something new that gets my attention.


Now they have a 24” flexible plastic strap that I have my eye on, very reasonably priced at $15.95 and I would probably be stupid enough to buy their rubber strap too.

Oh my. Why do I keep looking for weapons of ass destruction?

Lucky Fellow

One of F/M Spanking World most recent posts is a listing to a free Spanking Gallery of Sweedish Discipline from Lina.   Well, I may a be a bit odd, but for me pictures like these are very exciting.

These have a much more domestic look to them and not so much of a Fem Domme look. Not that there's anything wrong with the Fem Domme look if that's your thing but there is something more realistic for me when the Fem Spanker isn't scantily clad in leather and rhinestones.

Here in the second photo shows a woman who is concentrating on his vulnerable cheeks and she's clearly on the way to giving him something that he'll be able to remember and cherish for a while.

Sure she's a hot Sweedish Blonde and that's a good thing, but there's certainly much more. She has the look of the sort of woman who has no problem following her man's lead on his arm on the street, but also very capable of setting the rules and enforcing them at home as we see here. To me, that's very sexy.

This third photo is a bit scary if you've ever been in this position, and I have. With her weight on his back it's very difficult if not impossible to get away. All he can do is stare at her heels (yeah, that's good too) and accept the pain from the well placed and effective bathbrush.

Obviously she is deservedly proud of her handiwork and willing to show it off.

Won't be Exciting for Long

Sure, the whole idea of being taken OTK by our lady is a bit of a turn on, but it sure doesn’t last for long when she has a point to get across.

 There might be a little remark about being such a waste, or “ I see you’re enjoying yourself… Well I’ll change that very quickly!”

In fact when our manhood betrays us, it seems there is a certain vigor to seeing that the spanking won’t be something to be enjoyed. Perhaps it becomes some sort of challenge. There is no doubt, it's a sure thing that each of these men will be getting a especially long and certainly very painful spanking.

It never fails, being spanked by her draws us to it again and again. Every single time we forget what it was like the last time. Yet we crave being there again. When first climbing over her knee we experience her positioning 'things' in a way that we cherish the sensation... being against her inner thigh but that sensation is momentary and fleeting.

Then it begins.
We forget the sting, the thud, the burn…

but especially the sting.

Dress Code

Probably the most sensuous aspect or the prime appeal of being spanked by my lady is the way she dresses for the spanking. There are no two ways about it, women can dress differently than men do. Yes, a woman can wear jeans and sneakers and still look sexy, in fact very sexy if the jeans are tight in all of the right places.

But there is just something special and femine about a skirt or dress. Not to forget how sexy heels can look and I don't know why but I'm sure that few men would disagree.

Here in this first photo the ladies dress is off, she is still in feminine dress but I think the most exciting aspect of this photo is not so much how she is dressed, but the firm grip on the bath brush and the no nonsense stern finger pointing to the destination. There is no doubt that there is going to be a painful spanking and that there will be no delay tolerated. This photo is from SpankedByMyLady and I do know the gentleman who is about to feel the results, is one like me who appreciates the strength (and resulting sting) that can only come from a determined and perhaps pissed off woman.

The sensuality of the photo of an impending spanking supersedes all other thoughts. It draws us close and summons us hither... We forget the the pain, the embarrassment and which one us hasn't forgotten the terrible sting until we feel it again.

In this next photo is a determined woman, her man WILL be spanked. The thought of it has him a bit excited as we see the front of his shirt is tipped up a bit. She's probably thinking that it's a shame that his hard on will be wasted and it's clear she has every intention of making his joystick disappear in short order.

Here in the third photo we have a situation, someone is going to be getting a good spanking. The implement of pain is in hand and it's going to be used.

It's clear that it's going to happen nothing will change that. Yet it's clear that this woman is perfectly willing to listen to an explanation. In fact, she may have demanded an explanation. But there is the prime aspect to the photo, and it's that there WILL be a spanking.

Imagine that, you've got a perfectly good explanation and she is willing to listen. In fact, after the explanation she may very well agree that you did what you were expected to do.

You may very well be forgiven or she may even agree that you don't need to be forgiven and you were in the right all along.

No matter, a spanking has been ordered and it WILL be given and it's not subject to debate. Even if you don't deserve to be spanked for this, there are probably plenty of other things that you should be spanked for, so the effort won't be wasted.

I suppose I see this as being the most sensuous. The feminine dress, the heels, they all say woman and the whole thing says spanking, in fact I believe it says very painful spanking. You know the kind, tears won't mean the spanking is over... Tears just that the spanking is starting to work.